Character Portfolio: Lily Maverik

Lily Maverik. She’s the other main character in my novel Tiger Lily, buddy to the previously introduced Jason Strike. He has his own character portfolio, which you should definitely check out. But enough about him! Today is all about Lily. 

Lily was introduced to this series on page one. From the moment I started writing, I knew she would be the main character. I knew what she would be able to do, but that was about it. Lily went through a cycle of traits not unlike that life cycle of a butterfly. She was a less-than appealing caterpillar for a long time. (She’d probably never forgive me for that comparison) To my unending embarrassment, one of my beginning ideas for Tiger Lily was that she could be some kind of anti-poacher, raising awareness about illegal animal hunting. Clearly, that idea did not stick. 

I got the idea for this book –this character– a long time ago. I think between two and three years before I actually started writing it. Now some authors have ideas decades in advance. For me, two years was a long time. A loooong time to just sit on a character. But I’m glad I did. Forgive me for another colorful analogy, but it was like a slow cooker. If you open it up before you’re supposed to, you get a bunch of half cooked meat and vegetables. Open it up when it’s marinated long enough, and you have a delicious meal.

When I first started writing Lily, I had no idea how to write realistic anger and stubbornness. So Lily came off as bratty and obnoxious. And the story was clearly missing something. Several things, as it would turn out. But I couldn’t figure out what it was. So I abandoned her for a while. 

When I came back, I understood that Lily had to be deeply angry. She had to be an open, raw, bleeding wound. And she needed another character. A foil of sorts, someone who could fix what was wrong and ultimately make this a book of redemption. And that one side character was just waiting to be something more. 

I know I said I would make this post all about Lily, but truly, Lily changes because of Jason. The Lily as I know her is the way she is because she met someone who cared. Someone who could wrap up the wound that was her existence. Spoiler alert, that wasn’t Jason. It was Jesus. But Jason led her to Jesus, so I have to give him some of the credit. 

Lily starts out the book as someone who is angry to hide the fact that she’s hurting. She ends it as someone who endured the full force of her hurt and began to heal. In between, a whole lot of things happen. She is introduced right away by showing that she lives two lives –the one of the tiger, and the one of the girl. And, as I’ve probably said enough times, she’s angry. I kept writing this rage-filled, broken girl until I found her theme: Self-hatred. It’s not other people Lily hates. It’s herself. She just happens to project it onto everyone around her. 

Now, I didn’t bring in a topic like self-hatred and, in the end, thougts akin to suicidal to leave them un-dealt with. The goal was to bring in Jesus and to show Lily that she really could be loved. One of my pitches for this story is that it deals with two topics: Self-hatred and doubting God. Jason handles one. Lily takes care of the other. I describe her and her relationship with the tiger that is her as this: We all have some part of ourselves that we don’t like. I took that part, blew it up to epic proportions, and added a little spin. 

I’m sure I’m confusing the order, leaving her backstory for last, but really, that’s how I got to know Lily. So, welcome to my mind, I guess.  

Lily lives with both of her parents, but they are only adding to her self-hatred. They don’t know how to handle their emotionally unstable daughter and eventually give her over to a scientist. Of course, there’s plenty of agony thrown in between stages, but this is the accelerated version. After she’s given over to the scientist, she discovers that he doesn’t, in fact, have good intentions. So she does the natural thing. Runs away into the jungle, only to be plunged into a journey of self discovery, rejection, and hurt. 

Lily slips into a state of constant mental breakdown. She knows only that she is terrible and that she will “never be able to get rid of it.” So when she’s caught, she fights. Loses, but ends up with blood on her hands. 

I’m gonna try to not spoil the whole book, but Lily basically teeters on the edge of insanity/losing herself to the tiger, and trusting the wrong people, and figuring out whether or not to listen to the right people. One big cocktail of confusion and hurt and trying to find the light. 

When I say Lily reflects me at the time I wrote her, I always feel like people will think that I was struggling with self-harm or hatred. I wasn’t. I just went through a period of anxiety and not liking that I was. I didn’t like that part of myself, and it somehow bled through into Lily. Unfortunately, my challenges became her trauma.

But I hope that in the end, Lily can bring out the redemption side of hurt. That one day, she can show someone that they are not unlovable either.